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Blues Tutorial #13: Blues is not a matter of color.

29 May

woods

Blues Tutorial #13:

Blues is not a matter of color. It’s a matter of bad luck. Tiger Woods cannot sing the blues. Gary Coleman could. Ugly white people also got a leg up on the blues.

http://pinterest.com/pin/39406565462226736/

Blues Tutorial #12: You have a right to sing the blues if you just can’t be satisfied.

25 May

jagger2

Blues Tutorial #12:

You have the right to sing the blues if: (a) you’re older than dirt, (b) you’re blind, (c) you shot a man in Memphis, (d) you can’t be satisfied.

But you ain’t got the right to sing the blues if: (a) you have all your teeth, (b) you were once blind but now can see, (c) the man in Memphis lived, (d) you have a retirement plan or trust fund.

http://pinterest.com/pin/39406565462205111/

Blues Tutorial #11: No one will believe it’s the blues if you wear a suit.

22 May

suit_bum

Blues Tutorial #11:

No one will believe it’s the blues if you wear a suit, unless you happen to be an old ethnic person, and you slept in it.

http://pinterest.com/pin/39406565462191439/

Blues Tutorial #10: Good places for the blues – highway, jailhouse, empty bed, and bottom of a whiskey glass.

19 May

jail_6

Blues Tutorial #10:

Good places for the blues: (a) highway, (b) jailhouse, (c) empty bed, (d) bottom of a whiskey glass. Bad places: (a) ashrams, (b) gallery openings, (c) Ivy League institutions, (d) golf courses.

 http://pinterest.com/pin/39406565462175469/

Blues Tutorial #9: You can’t have no blues in an office or shopping mall.

9 May

dumpster_4

Blues Tutorial #9:

You can’t have no blues in an office or a shopping mall. The lighting is all wrong. Go outside to the parking lot or sit by the dumpster.

http://pinterest.com/pin/39406565462131523/

Harry Truman, b. May 8: “A statesman is a politician who’s been dead for 15 years.”

8 May

truman1

“A politician is a man who understands government. A statesman is a politician who’s been dead for 15 years.”
~ Harry S. Truman, b. 8 May 1884

http://pinterest.com/pin/39406565462125892/

Blues Tutorial #8: A man with male pattern baldness ain’t the blues.

1 May

conehead

Blues Tutorial #8:

A man with male pattern baldness ain’t the blues. A woman with male pattern baldness is. Breaking your leg cuz you skiing is not the blues. Breaking your leg ‘cuz an alligator be chomping on it is.

http://pinterest.com/pin/39406565462095442/

Blues Tutorial #7: You can’t have the blues in any place that don’t get rain.

30 Apr

bums_1a

Blues Tutorial #7:

Blues can take place in New York but not in Hawaii or any place in Canada. Havin’ hard times in St. Paul or Tucson is just depression. Chicago, St.Louis & Kansas City still the best places to have the blues. You can’t have the blues in any place that don’t get rain.

http://pinterest.com/pin/39406565462090290/

The Unknown Author: “A metaphor is like a simile.”

23 Feb

Alan_infrared

“A metaphor is like a simile.”

~ Author Unknown

 

After awhile, even the nail misses the hammer.

22 Feb

3 nails 2

After awhile, even the nail misses the hammer.