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Ronald Reagan (b. February 6th): “The Ten Commandments and Congress…”

6 Feb

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“I have wondered at times what the Ten Commandments would have looked like if Moses had run them through the US Congress.”

~ Ronald Reagan, b. 6 February 1911

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Julia Louis-Dreyfus (b. January 13): “If I wrote a book, it would be about hair.”

13 Jan

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“I guess if I wrote a book one day, it would be about hair.”

~ Julia Louis-Dreyfus, b. 13 January 1961

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Billy Connolly (b. November 24): “I think my securities far outweigh my insecurities….”

24 Nov

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“I think my securities far outweigh my insecurities. I am not nearly as afraid of  myself and my imagination as I used to be.”

~ Billy Connolly, b. 24 November 1942

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Rodney Dangerfield (b. November 22): “My mother never breast fed me…”

22 Nov

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“My mother never breast fed me, she told me she only liked me as a friend.”

~ Rodney Dangerfield, b. 22 November 1921

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Jimmy Kimmel (b. November 13): “I don’t really need to be dirty…”

13 Nov
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“I’m a creative consultant, whatever that means. I don’t really need to be dirty to be funny. But almost every week, someone’s mad at me.”

~ Jimmy Kimmel, b. 13 November 1967

 

John Cleese (b. October 27): “Comedy works best when it is mean-spirited.”

27 Oct

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“Comedy always works best when it is mean-spirited.”

~ John Cleese, b. 27 October 1939

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Lenny Bruce (b. October 13): “If you can take the hot lead enema…”

13 Oct

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“If you can take the hot lead enema, then you can cast the first stone.”

~ Lenny Bruce, b. 13 October 1925

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